Another Mothers Day...

As Mothers Day approaches in just a few days, I find myself becoming anxious and honestly a little crabby, because it will be another Mothers day as a Mother of 9, but nothing to show for it. I posted a song link in a previous post by Selah, called "I will carry you" (if your speakers are turned on, and you have the music on my blog playing, then you are listening to it right now) and I am so thankful to have come across this song, because it really sums things up about how I think and feel, and it takes the words right out of my mouth. If you have never listened to the song, these are the lyrics:


"There were photographs I wanted to take
Things I wanted to show you
Sing sweet lullabies, wipe your teary eyes
Who could love you like this?

People say that I am brave but I'm not
Truth is I'm barely hanging on
But there's a greater story
Written long before me
Because He loves you like this

[Chorus]
I will carry you
While your heart beats here
Long beyond the empty cradle
Through the coming years
I will carry you
All my life
And I will praise the One Who's chosen me
To carry you

Such a short time
Such a long road
All this madness
But I know
That the silence
Has brought me to His voice
And He says ...

I've shown her photographs of time beginning
Walked her through the parted seas
Angel lullabies, no more teary eyes
Who could love her like this?

[Chorus]"




I will carry you, All my life, And I will praise the One Who's chosen me,To carry you.
This part, in the chorus is my favorite part of the song, because while some may not acknowledge the children we have lost, some may not even remember...we, as the parents of our 9 babies, will always, always remember them, we carry them in our hearts every single day, and while time eases the pain little by little, the life and loss of our babies will never go away. Although for a short time, some longer than others, we are so thankful God gave us the Blessing of having those babies for the time we did. We have learned so much over these past 5 years on this journey and while some may wonder why we dont just give up after loosing 9 babies, all I can answer to them is...tonight, when you kiss your babies goodnight, ask yourself that question.

Another Mothers day without you, my sweet little Angels, another Mothers day with empty arms and an empty womb, but one thing is for sure, my heart is FULL. Full of love for each of you, and it is because of you that I AM a Mother.